Well this past week has ushered in a new energy and I am riding the waves of that, and seeing it all around me. The bins, the sense of change, of metamorphosing, of lenghtening bones and getting stretch marks becasue it comes so fast.
My research is in rapid acceleration as the timeline looms close, only 2 months to completion. I am now in the phase where my natural poetic voice must be put through the threshing floor and reproduced with a cohesion and clarity that I do not yet feel capable of. I am afraid of loosing the flow and the beauty...I am afraid of short choppy sentences. And, I might be afraid of really standing out on my own, of spaciousness, of lots of little paragraphs that can't hide within a flowery prose.
Yesterday I cried great big crocodile tears over it, and that felt good. And now, well I should be editing and I am writing this blog =) One more cup of coffee and then.... It just feels itchy, inside where it is not blood and organs, where it is the subtle channel of light that manifests me, it feels itchy there, and it looks like Animal from the muppets. God help us!
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"I know these dancers.
Day and night I sing their songs
in this phenomenal cage." Rumi
But Also,
"This is the Material Plane
And it could use a good sanding."
Coleman Barks
And Finally,
"I dwell in possibility,
A fairer house than prose."
Emily Dickinson
It feels so big when we are inside of it, this drama of life! That's when I escape to the bubble bath and pull out the volumes of poems.
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